I have always considered myself to be a “nice” girl. When
all the sorority sisters in college were blowing the bartender from the club by
the dumpster, I knew my morals probably superseded most. It took a long time in
my life before I gave up the “lost Spanish galleon at the bottom of the ocean,”
and recently, I have remembered WHY.
I do not have a Facebook account. I despise Facebook and
think it’s the cause of most problems in today’s dating scene. Recently, I
attended a charity gala (and was looking pretty smokin’ might I add). My friend
posted pics of us on HIS Facebook page from that night and suddenly, I had an
admirer. One of his friends, who we will call the Seal, inquired as to my
dating status and asked for my number. I
saw a picture of him through our mutual friend’s page, and Damn! He was cute! He
surfed! He had tattoos! (all requirements for someone I would find HOT)
He called me (yes, CALL) and asked me out (AND picked me up!
-Sad that these things aren’t a normality, right??) we hit it off right away,
had a great dinner and were totally at ease around each other. Man, I was even pretty
much sober (does 2 5.9% alcohol blueberry beers count?). It was a rainy night and he invited himself
back to my place to “watch a movie.” God, why is that still the oldest line in
the book and actually WORKS every time??? We cozied up on the couch to “watch
the movie” when really we were just watching our move to the next room.
In the midst of our cuddling in the other room, things start
to progress…but let’s just say for someone who’s in the military, his flag pole
couldn’t really stand at attention…and I think that’s the point this whole
thing gets awkward.
He asked to see me again that Wednesday and I agree to the
next date. The next day, Monday he
contacts me to hang out again, and this time “REALLY watch the movie.” I think,
wow, cool, this dude wants to see me again right away. Should I play a game and
make him wait until Wednesday or do I just go with it. I’m sure you can guess
the choice I made….
We make plans for a Friday night. It’s my friend’s birthday
dinner and I asked him if he would be okay with us doing that since we’d not
made official plans. He picks me up and we go to dinner. We all laugh, have a
great time, share a few bottles of wine, and then…. the bill comes. One wouldn’t
think this would not be an issue on a date, but he doesn’t reach for his wallet. The
person in charge of the bill then asks me for my card for my share…..then he
produces his card (finally) for his share. Everyone is looking at me shaking
their head. My girlfriend and her (24 yr old) son both can’t believe this
douche bag just let me pay for dinner.
We leave and he asks to come upstairs to “use the bathroom.”
He does what he has to do and jumps on me on the couch and tries to start
hooking up. Yes, this is a REAL story. I told him I thought it was time to call
it a night and to leave. He txted me that he didn’t understand why we had such
a fun night and I sent him home. I let
him know that if was really wondering why, I would enlighten him.
Lesson Learned: Men, if you want a happy ending after the
date, don’t let a girl buy her own dinner and drinks.
